Newsletter, The Inferno Page 2
The challenge was called “Rope Burn”.
3 people from each team would be on a platform above the water & the
rope would go to land where they have to build a Survivor fire to burn through
their opponent’s rope to drop them in the water.
All the materials to build the fire were out on a raft so they have to
swim out there to get it & try to keep it dry on the swim back.
The people on the platforms above had buckets of water they could dump on
the swimmers to try to ruin the materials.
At Deliberation the GG’s decided not to pick Abe cuz
they think he would just win the Lifeshield.
The BA’s didn’t want to pick Timmy.
They ended up going the pussy route & picking
The challenge was "Reversible Climbing Wall".
They pair up in guy/ girl teams & have to climb up a 40-foot wall w/ the guy
on one side & the girl on the other & they would kick the pegs through
the holes to each other to get up the wall & then get their flag & go
back down. The guy & girl w/ the best time would win a bike & the
quickest guys get the lifeshield. 1 Bad Ass girl has to sit out & that
was Aneesa. 1 Good Girl had to go twice & I have no idea how they got
to Colie the loser but she was chosen. I think cuz it is
Colie paired up w/
Timmy & Susie went against Derrick & Janelle.
Janelle & Derrick got 9:20 while the others got 11:52.
Cara & Ace beat Kenny & Jenn w/ 11:34.
Jenn DQd her team by falling off.
John & Paula beat Danny & Ev w/ 6:44 & the
losers got 9:49.
Davis & Colie go last by themselves & finished
w/ 9:16. The Good Guys average time is 10:23 while the Bad Asses was 8:38
so they win the 10 grand & even the banks at $30,000. Tonya &
Abram supposedly beat Paula & Jenn even thought I could have sworn the
graphic said they both had 6:44. TJ said they beat them by a second.
So they got the bikes & Abram & John have the lifeshields.
Davis & Danny walk into the Pit & Abram said he
left it up to Danny & he said he wanted it so he stays in. John said
new guy has to pay his dues & leaves him in. Danny looked like a
psycho & had his Mom's name written on his cheek. The challenge was
called "Watch your Back". It was a big game of Tag where there
were ladders on either side of a platform & 1 guy started up top & the
other on the ground & they ran like in a huge habitrail & had to catch
up to the other & the one to do it 2 out of 3 wins. Danny is just too
roided up or whatever. He couldn't run fast & was breathing heavy.
The next episode began w/ Jenn thinking she would get
voted in every time & little tough girl claims she is fine w/ that.
Tonya tells us she can't stand Susie cuz Susie had said "what's that
smell" & then asked if it was Tonya's perfume & said she smelled
like a stripper... but in a good way. Tonya is such a ho-bag that I can
totally see her wearing WAY too much nasty perfume & am once again 100%
behind Susie. Tonya goes all bitch-fest on Susie & I cracked up when
Susie said there are people dying all over the world. So Natasha.
Susie tells us she thinks Tonya is bi-polar. No. Just a camera &
real-life whore. She puts on this bitch act to get more camera time that's
all. Tonya goes off to whine to Ev about it & is so pathetic claiming
she doesn't care but she is obsessing on Susie & it is all she can talk
about & gets madder & madder while Susie can just laugh about it.
The challenge was called "Grape Smash".
It was total I Love Lucy. They had to smash grapes & then use only
their mouth to transport the juice to fill as many bottles as they could in a
half hour. They had to wear Speedo bathing suits & if they refuse to
they can't participate. I was shocked that Ace, Alton & Timmy pussied
So the Bad Asses dominated cuz they were now up 2
people. Tonya even took the time during the challenge to stop & point
at the other team & laugh at them. I so hate this chick. Kenny
made me laugh cuz at one point he was picking Abram up & body slamming him
on the grapes to smash them. The BA's filled 15 bottles to the GG's 5.
Total ass kicking. Timmy said his only regret was pissing off his team.
& boy was Colie pissed.
Tonya wants to go against Susie. Susie knows she
is going in cuz they really hate her but she thinks Tonya is trying to get her
to pick her to go in & she doesn't want to give Tonya what she wants.
John thinks Aneesa holds her team back so they are not going to pick her.
Over at the BA's there is no discussion as it is Susie period.
The GG's pick Jenn. We then see a clip of Susie in
deliberation that this will leave Aneesa to f*ck up the missions through another
week. Tonya was pissed not to be chosen & whined it wasn't fair for
Jenn to be chosen again even though the hypocrites picked the same person too.
The BA's do officially pick Susie. Jenn claims she is fine going in but
Tonya says she wants it & brags about how cool it would be to replace her
after winning the Lifeshield like it would be this huge ratings moment or
While Tonya is getting herself all pissed off &
whining about Susie, Susie, Cara & Colie are having fun playing a game I
would love to play ‘I Hate Tonya Because..." Susie said cuz she is
a slut. Cara said cuz her voice is so scratchy. Susie said cuz ever
5 seconds she is in a new sexual position. Colie said cuz she is more evil
than Tonya Harding. Susie said cuz she called her a f*cking bitch that
morning. Cara said cuz she thinks she's a Playmate & she's not [but
Cara is]. Susie said cuz she tries to get involved in her life when she's
not invited. Tonya claims she will make Susie's life hell till she cries
& goes home. Honey you don't need to do anything. You do that
just by breathing.
Colie & Susie are all friendly so Susie says if she wins the Lifeshield she
has to put Paula in. John wants to
keep Paula cuz she is a good player &
The mission is called “Steady as you Go”.
The girls have to get from platform to platform that are 60 feet apart by
stepping on 8 foot tall logs that their team has to hold up for them.
The fastest girl gets a GPS. Paula
takes on Aneesa & gets 12:45 while Aneesa did 13:16.
Colie falls & is DQ’d yet again & cries while Tonya finished at
5:23. Cara tries to go slow so Susie
can win & Ev brags how good she is & then falls.
Dumbass. Cara got 7:00.
Janelle was DQ’d fo r using her safety harness to balance & Susie
got 4:51. Jenn got 5:39.
The Bad Asses time averaged out to 11:23 & the Good Guys beat them w/
10:24. So that ties up the banks
again at $40,000. Susie
was the fastest & got the prize as well as the Lifeshield.
Tonya won it for the BA’s.
Tonya goes back & forth about replacing Jenn.
She really wants to go against Susie & now she won’t be there.
Susie asks her team what she should do on the bus.
Tonya decides to stay out of the Inferno & Jenn
tells us that is selfish. Poor baby.
Susie went w/ the team’s choice & picked Colie & tells us she
can’t make it to the end w/o her team so has to do what they want.
The challenge is called “Spokesmodel”.
It is a huge wheel w/ spokes that spins & they have to try to stay at
the top of it. Jenn kicks Colie’s
ass. Susie tells us that Colie is
not a strong competitor so she made the right choice putting her in.
Abram tells the guys he would be doing somersaults if he just got rid of
Colie. John said the girls wanted to
keep her cuz she was funny.
They showed 2 Eps back-to-back again.
I tape the first one during the sneak peek at 3:30 but then have to
record this one as it airs at 9:30. It
cut off the very beginning so I don’t know what went on between Tonya &
Davis. I know the preview showed
them kissing at a club.
John says he wants to get rid of Derrick or Abram cuz
they are the strongest. A lot of the
Good Guys are playing the “I Hate Tonya Because Game” as Tonya eavesdrops at
their door. Paula said for learning
to be a stripper. Susie said for
doing lunges by the van while looking at her reflection.
Cara said & making her ass fat from doing them.
Aneesa has a knee injury & says it is a recurring
problem & has to see a doctor. But
first they go to their next mission, “Leaps & Bounds”.
There are 5 trampolines that are separated by a platform that gets
smaller & smaller. They must get
their whole team on each platform w/o touching it.
The Good Guys get to pick who goes first & it is the Bad Asses.
Aneesa wasn’t allowed to compete cuz of her knee.
So Paula sits out as well for the GGs cuz she had surgery on a torn ACL.
The BA’s girls really sucked on th e first jump but got into the rhythm
& finish w/ 8:25. Susie
& Davis sucked for the GGs & then on the 3rd platform Timmy knocked a
bunch of them over & had to start that one again.
They got 9:05 so the BA’s win another 10 grand to bring their total to
The BA’s say Davis & Susie blew it for their team.
At the GG’s Deliberation Ace says they are getting away from their
original plan of taking out their strong guys.
They say if he went in wouldn’t he want to go against Kenny?
He says no. He wants Derrick
or Abram. The BA’s think more
about who they can beat since they only have 3 guys to their 5.
So they think that is Ace.
The Good Guys officially pick KENNY saying it is cuz of
his good looks. Kenny winks at the
camera. The BA’s pick ACE.
Ace tells us he isn’t there for the money but to prove he can get to
Janelle & Tonya bitch at Aneesa about her knee.
Jenn is once again telling us someone is selfish.
Aneesa refuses to quit & warns that they don’t want to bring out
Gauntlet 2 Aneesa.
5/22: Only 1
episode this week. Derrick wants
Kenny to man up & go into the Inferno. Abram
doesn’t think either Kenny or Ace will win the Lifeshield.
The challenge was called “Dog Day Afternoon”.
They have to do a 50-yard dash in a guy/ girl team pulling a couple from
the other tam on a dogsled. The
fastest guy & girl gets a car audio system.
Aneesa & Jenn sit out while Paula & Susie had to go twice.
Susie & Davis took on Derrick & Tonya &
Davis fell & Derrick & Tonya beat them.
Janelle & Abram beat Paula & John.
Cara & Ace took on Ev & Kenny & Ace fell & they lost.
Alton & Paula went alone & at this point the BA’s average time
was 3:27 & the GG’s was 3:36. There
was just Susie & Timmy left. Timmy
sucked & fell & hit his face on the bar & then said he couldn’t do
it anymore cuz he heard something tear in his leg.
They were DQ’d & had 30 minutes added to the time so the BA’s won
w/ their 3:27 while the GG’s ended up w/ 5:38.
Ace & Cara had the fastest time for the GG’s at 1:56 so Ace gets to
replace himself in the Inferno. Kenny
& Ev were the fastest overall w/ 1:21 so get the audio system & Kenny
saved himself as well.
Timmy volunteered to go in cuz his injury is holding his
The challenge was called “Smash House”.
They would be up in the air in 3 glass cages & have to use a metal
ring to break out all the sides including the floor & EVERY PIECE OF GLASS
HAS TO BE BROKEN. At one point Ace
started going for his floor when 1 wall was still up.
Timmy got all his done first but wait, there is a lame f*cking DQ!
Apparently one of the pieces that Timmy broke w/ the ring fell to the
ground & wasn’t shattered so he is out.
What a crock of sh*t. It is
not his fault that they constructed yet another faulty challenge & that it
fell to th e ground & didn’t shatter.
Timmy said he had to take it like a man & officially retires from the
challenge. I actually teared up when
they went to a montage of history on the challenges & Road Rules.
He has always been one of my favorite alumni.
I respect that he knows it is time to move on & I hope they let him
host the challenges or something from now on.
Timmy took the time to give a peptalk to both teams & they all really
respect him. He told TJ that it is
better to play & lose than not play at all.
Next week the challenge involves a handcar & Aneesa
pitches a fit saying she is not sitting out another challenge when she knows she
can do it.
This is on Tuesdays at 9pm CST on MTV.
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